The Battle in My Head: A poem about health anxiety

Symptom? Is that a symptom?

Yes, I think it is!! A symptom of that God awful deadly disease that I’ve read about at some point.

I MUST have this disease now! Even though I have only one symptom.

Even though I have a symptom that could be one hundred other things.

Even though my symptom is almost always the result of too much anxiety and overthinking.

Maybe I’ll see my doctor….even though I just saw her a few months ago for that different symptom.

Maybe she missed something.

Maybe the symptoms are connected.

I know! I’ll push for an MRI or some invasive test to BE SURE!

Doctor says I don’t need the testing….that it is likely stress.

Okay then. I feel better…..for a day or two.

Oh! The symptom is still there….and I KNOW it is getting worse. I know it! I know this because I keep THINKING about it.

That’s it! I’m going back to the doctor and demanding that scan/test/reassurance!

The doctor gets frustrated and gives in and I feel relief. For now…..until the cycle repeats again…..

Symptom? Is that a symptom?

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